So I've been here just over a week and it feels like I'm on a trip and having a vacation with the exception that I've moved my entire closet with me and my dresser and other daily nessacities.
In the last week, I've seen 3 movies, walked the mall (while grabbing job applications) and rearranged my bedroom about 5 million times. Saw Transformers and loved it again, and saw the new Harry Potter movie twice. First time was the midnight showing when it came out and then again today. However, since I don't keep up with the series and haven't read the books, I watched the 4th and 5th movies before seeing it again today so I not quite as lost.
In a couple weeks, it seems we might be going to Forks (YEAH FOR TWILIGHT), and into Seattle for a chocolate tour... hmmm yeah chocolate is my friend. Once I'm not so tired, I'll post more, but wanted to get a little blurp up!
HUGS!
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Moving
So amazing to me how this move is so vastly different then just going away to college. It actually hurts to leave. I know I'll miss out on a lot but at the same time by not moving I know that I'll miss out on so much more. I need to try. I need my family to understand and I know them to know while they might not understand the reasons, it only boils down to I need to prove to myself that I can anything I want, any where I want, without the crutch of my parents.
I love my parents more then anything, but I need to know and show myself that I live without them as a constant bail-out, a hovering-parent that still tells me to do things you'd tell an 8 year-old, and without seeing them everyday, especially my mom. Being an only child, raised many a times in a single parent home while my dad was TDY, stationed elsewhere or something that pulled him away from my childhood, due to his military career, my mother and I have a bond that breaks many barriers and is stronger then most. I am her friend, confidant, shoulder and she is mine. That will be the hardest!! (But hey, that's why we have Skype!) Most of all, I'm afraid to leave the one thing that loves me no matter what- Cleo.
Pets are ultimately the one true love of your life. You can lay it all out on the table, tell someone you love them and want to move across the country for them, be with them always, but in the end, the one that is waiting for you to get home is your pets. You love them like a family member, rush them to the ER Vet when something is wrong and you'd do anything for them, while they entirely rely on you for their basic needs. For everything, she is my sister, my daughter, my dog and I've very sadden to not take her, but alas, she is also super attached to my parents.... And I'll be back throughout the year, so it's easier for her to stay here.
Here, being Colorado, is my home. Where I was born, where we came back to when my dad retired from the military, and just a couple hours from my mom's family. There is Seattle. Where I want to start my life. Breathe air that is part of my uncharted waters of my life, ( and my asthma doesn't EVER bother me there!). I stood at the front of my steps tonight before walking in the door with a sober thought that this is really the last time I'll be doing that while I actually still live here. While I have no indention of permanently living in Washington and returning once school is done in roughly 4-5 years, in many ways, this is a farewell and a forever farewell. I will no longer be that child that moved back home and just stayed, I will actually be grown-up and living my own life, creating new adventures on my own terms and living my life the way I want to without the carefully guarded criticism of family and those I call my family. I will be able to spread my wings, fly and see where my life takes me. This alone scares me some, but excites me more. Mostly, I'm scared that I will actually break my mold of my fear.... of success. Having failed out of college on my first try, I came to realize that I'm fearful of my own success, which is why I fail again. I'm fearful that I'll succeed and my family won't be there with me, I'm fearful of not taking my parents with me on my journey to a successful life, I'm fearful that I will be alone always and forever (which is my greatest fear and my deepest), I'm fearful of losing who I am, what I want to be, who I will and those that mean the most me (mind you, not by death, because death and I are very well acquainted, remember, I do work with hospice care, but I mean literally, not have them in my life and grow old together, sitting on the front porch talking about the good ole' days). I hate change at any rate (interesting since this move alone is a HUGE change, but I do), but having always set my own expectations so high, I have failed myself so many times, while at the same time, surpassing others expectations of me, that I've come to expect that I'll fail myself and more and more that means I tend to fail others too, except Cleo... cause I can never fail her....
(as she walks out here cause she heard me and wants let out...)
Le sigh... but I'm moving and I need to deal with it and all that comes with it! Lets just hope I can hang on for the ride!!!!!!!
I love my parents more then anything, but I need to know and show myself that I live without them as a constant bail-out, a hovering-parent that still tells me to do things you'd tell an 8 year-old, and without seeing them everyday, especially my mom. Being an only child, raised many a times in a single parent home while my dad was TDY, stationed elsewhere or something that pulled him away from my childhood, due to his military career, my mother and I have a bond that breaks many barriers and is stronger then most. I am her friend, confidant, shoulder and she is mine. That will be the hardest!! (But hey, that's why we have Skype!) Most of all, I'm afraid to leave the one thing that loves me no matter what- Cleo.
Pets are ultimately the one true love of your life. You can lay it all out on the table, tell someone you love them and want to move across the country for them, be with them always, but in the end, the one that is waiting for you to get home is your pets. You love them like a family member, rush them to the ER Vet when something is wrong and you'd do anything for them, while they entirely rely on you for their basic needs. For everything, she is my sister, my daughter, my dog and I've very sadden to not take her, but alas, she is also super attached to my parents.... And I'll be back throughout the year, so it's easier for her to stay here.
Here, being Colorado, is my home. Where I was born, where we came back to when my dad retired from the military, and just a couple hours from my mom's family. There is Seattle. Where I want to start my life. Breathe air that is part of my uncharted waters of my life, ( and my asthma doesn't EVER bother me there!). I stood at the front of my steps tonight before walking in the door with a sober thought that this is really the last time I'll be doing that while I actually still live here. While I have no indention of permanently living in Washington and returning once school is done in roughly 4-5 years, in many ways, this is a farewell and a forever farewell. I will no longer be that child that moved back home and just stayed, I will actually be grown-up and living my own life, creating new adventures on my own terms and living my life the way I want to without the carefully guarded criticism of family and those I call my family. I will be able to spread my wings, fly and see where my life takes me. This alone scares me some, but excites me more. Mostly, I'm scared that I will actually break my mold of my fear.... of success. Having failed out of college on my first try, I came to realize that I'm fearful of my own success, which is why I fail again. I'm fearful that I'll succeed and my family won't be there with me, I'm fearful of not taking my parents with me on my journey to a successful life, I'm fearful that I will be alone always and forever (which is my greatest fear and my deepest), I'm fearful of losing who I am, what I want to be, who I will and those that mean the most me (mind you, not by death, because death and I are very well acquainted, remember, I do work with hospice care, but I mean literally, not have them in my life and grow old together, sitting on the front porch talking about the good ole' days). I hate change at any rate (interesting since this move alone is a HUGE change, but I do), but having always set my own expectations so high, I have failed myself so many times, while at the same time, surpassing others expectations of me, that I've come to expect that I'll fail myself and more and more that means I tend to fail others too, except Cleo... cause I can never fail her....
(as she walks out here cause she heard me and wants let out...)
Le sigh... but I'm moving and I need to deal with it and all that comes with it! Lets just hope I can hang on for the ride!!!!!!!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
My Resume
Phone 719-237-9018
Education
Name of School: Kaplan University
Major/Minor: Psychology, emphasis in Child Development
Degree: Bachelors, May 2010 (projected)
Name of School: Pikes Peak Community College
Major/Minor: History and General Studies
Degree: Associates Degree, August 2005
Achievements and Volunteering
Completed PRAXIS II, Elementary Content Test Code 0014
Lifetime member of Girl Scouts of the USA as well as current volunteer
• Worked with girls on earning badges and honor awards
• Aided in weekly/monthly meetings
Member of the Alpha Omicron Pi International Fraternity
Volunteered with Smart Girl program for middle school girls 2007- 2008
• “Smart-Girl empowers girls to develop emotional intelligence, critical thinking, and problem solving skills within a relational context that addresses their need for belonging.” © Smart Girl website ( http://www.smart-girl.org/program.html )
Assistant Third Grade Girls Basketball Coach at Remington Elementary in Falcon District 49, 2007-2008
Volunteer at Pikes Peak Hospice and Palliative Care Nov 2008- Present
• Assisted patients at long term care facilities and their families
• Worked with grief programs
Published poet: Twilight Musings © 2005
Published photographer: Life’s Easel © 2007
Employment History
The Melting Pot, Colorado Springs, CO May 2008- July 2009
Trainer and Lead Hospitality Specialist and Server
Lead Hospitality Specialist Responsibilities
• Trained and Supervised all new and current employees
Server Responsibilities
Assisted and worked with guests to give them a Perfect Night Out
Falcon District 49, Colorado Springs, CO August 2007 – January 2008
Autism Teaching Assistant
• Assisted/instructed students throughout the day
• Kept communication logs throughout day with parents on child’s progress
• Worked with students one-on-one on reading, math and writing, including hand-over-hand
• Discrete trial testing students (Similar to Applied Behavioral Analysis Therapy)
• Focused on: Alphabet, Numbers, sight words, and spelling words
• Received CPR and AED Training
School District 11, Colorado Springs, CO June 2002 – May 2008
Teaching Assistant and Substitute Teaching Assistant, Special Education Assistant and Clerical
Aided teachers throughout the day
• Supervised students from the cafeteria to the classroom
• Aided the teacher in development of lesson plans and testing
• Helped the students with schoolwork throughout the day
• Assisted in electives and other areas, as needed
• Assisted wherever needed by teacher
• Did one on one groups with students in reading
College of Engineering and Applied Science at UCCS, Colorado Springs, CO November 2006 – August 2007
Enrollment Coordinator (Student Employee)
Created and marketed ads for the college via high school yearbooks and newspapers
• Utilized several programs to accomplish these goals: Microsoft Excel, Microsoft Access, Microsoft Publisher, Microsoft Outlook, Microsoft Word
• Gave tours of facilities, including: The anechoic test chamber, microchips testing rooms, computer labs, Excel Center Labs
Get Started in Teaching Grant through UCCS, Colorado Springs, CO October 2006 – December 2006
Tutor
Assisted one Special Education and one General Education Teacher
• Assisted teachers as needed in the classroom or IEP support
• Tutored students on literacy and math
• Focuses were: Increase scores and competency in low strength areas, build confidence in low areas, bring each student up to grade-level performances
• Created and worked with general education teacher on activities to increase reading
• Created Magic ‘e’ games and match card game with sounds
• Worked with DIBELS testing
Kiddie Kandids Portrait Studio, Colorado Springs, CO August 2006 – October 2006
Photographer
Worked towards photography certification
Executed guest relations during volume and on a rotation basis based on standards
• Signed customers into computer system
• Cleaned up bays and lobby
• Cash handling
• Created and provided end of day daily reports
Created variety of photographic layouts for customer to pick prints from
• Edited and printed pictures in store
• Displayed and created examples for gifts that could be ordered
Olive Garden, Colorado Springs, CO August 2002 – September 2006
Server Certified Trainer, Host Certified Trainer
• Created wine and beverage training for serving staff
• Trained new hosts and servers
• Worked with management through meetings, creating communication and teamwork with coworkers
Claires Inc. : The Icing, Colorado Springs, CO May 2001 – June 2001
Third-Key Manager
• Ran and opened store on my own with guidance of upper management
• Stocked store
• Pierced ears while earning certification
Sears, Colorado Springs, CO October 1998 – September 2001
Sales Associate
• Gained cash handling experience as well as kept area clean and worked with other team members in my department
• Restocking and sorting of department
Seven Falls Company, Colorado Springs, CO June 1998 – July 1999
Cashier and Sales Associate
• Gained cash handling experience throughout different gift shops, on my own and with a team, restocked inventory on floor and tidied up all gift shops
Education
Name of School: Kaplan University
Major/Minor: Psychology, emphasis in Child Development
Degree: Bachelors, May 2010 (projected)
Name of School: Pikes Peak Community College
Major/Minor: History and General Studies
Degree: Associates Degree, August 2005
Achievements and Volunteering
Completed PRAXIS II, Elementary Content Test Code 0014
Lifetime member of Girl Scouts of the USA as well as current volunteer
• Worked with girls on earning badges and honor awards
• Aided in weekly/monthly meetings
Member of the Alpha Omicron Pi International Fraternity
Volunteered with Smart Girl program for middle school girls 2007- 2008
• “Smart-Girl empowers girls to develop emotional intelligence, critical thinking, and problem solving skills within a relational context that addresses their need for belonging.” © Smart Girl website ( http://www.smart-girl.org/program.html )
Assistant Third Grade Girls Basketball Coach at Remington Elementary in Falcon District 49, 2007-2008
Volunteer at Pikes Peak Hospice and Palliative Care Nov 2008- Present
• Assisted patients at long term care facilities and their families
• Worked with grief programs
Published poet: Twilight Musings © 2005
Published photographer: Life’s Easel © 2007
Employment History
The Melting Pot, Colorado Springs, CO May 2008- July 2009
Trainer and Lead Hospitality Specialist and Server
Lead Hospitality Specialist Responsibilities
• Trained and Supervised all new and current employees
Server Responsibilities
Assisted and worked with guests to give them a Perfect Night Out
Falcon District 49, Colorado Springs, CO August 2007 – January 2008
Autism Teaching Assistant
• Assisted/instructed students throughout the day
• Kept communication logs throughout day with parents on child’s progress
• Worked with students one-on-one on reading, math and writing, including hand-over-hand
• Discrete trial testing students (Similar to Applied Behavioral Analysis Therapy)
• Focused on: Alphabet, Numbers, sight words, and spelling words
• Received CPR and AED Training
School District 11, Colorado Springs, CO June 2002 – May 2008
Teaching Assistant and Substitute Teaching Assistant, Special Education Assistant and Clerical
Aided teachers throughout the day
• Supervised students from the cafeteria to the classroom
• Aided the teacher in development of lesson plans and testing
• Helped the students with schoolwork throughout the day
• Assisted in electives and other areas, as needed
• Assisted wherever needed by teacher
• Did one on one groups with students in reading
College of Engineering and Applied Science at UCCS, Colorado Springs, CO November 2006 – August 2007
Enrollment Coordinator (Student Employee)
Created and marketed ads for the college via high school yearbooks and newspapers
• Utilized several programs to accomplish these goals: Microsoft Excel, Microsoft Access, Microsoft Publisher, Microsoft Outlook, Microsoft Word
• Gave tours of facilities, including: The anechoic test chamber, microchips testing rooms, computer labs, Excel Center Labs
Get Started in Teaching Grant through UCCS, Colorado Springs, CO October 2006 – December 2006
Tutor
Assisted one Special Education and one General Education Teacher
• Assisted teachers as needed in the classroom or IEP support
• Tutored students on literacy and math
• Focuses were: Increase scores and competency in low strength areas, build confidence in low areas, bring each student up to grade-level performances
• Created and worked with general education teacher on activities to increase reading
• Created Magic ‘e’ games and match card game with sounds
• Worked with DIBELS testing
Kiddie Kandids Portrait Studio, Colorado Springs, CO August 2006 – October 2006
Photographer
Worked towards photography certification
Executed guest relations during volume and on a rotation basis based on standards
• Signed customers into computer system
• Cleaned up bays and lobby
• Cash handling
• Created and provided end of day daily reports
Created variety of photographic layouts for customer to pick prints from
• Edited and printed pictures in store
• Displayed and created examples for gifts that could be ordered
Olive Garden, Colorado Springs, CO August 2002 – September 2006
Server Certified Trainer, Host Certified Trainer
• Created wine and beverage training for serving staff
• Trained new hosts and servers
• Worked with management through meetings, creating communication and teamwork with coworkers
Claires Inc. : The Icing, Colorado Springs, CO May 2001 – June 2001
Third-Key Manager
• Ran and opened store on my own with guidance of upper management
• Stocked store
• Pierced ears while earning certification
Sears, Colorado Springs, CO October 1998 – September 2001
Sales Associate
• Gained cash handling experience as well as kept area clean and worked with other team members in my department
• Restocking and sorting of department
Seven Falls Company, Colorado Springs, CO June 1998 – July 1999
Cashier and Sales Associate
• Gained cash handling experience throughout different gift shops, on my own and with a team, restocked inventory on floor and tidied up all gift shops
Friday, August 29, 2008
So here I am again in Ohio, wondering why I came, but at the same time knowing why. Driving from Dayton back to Hillsboro, I loved watching the green lush scenery and the never ending land of crops upon crops. I love that about Ohio, it's so GREEN! :-) I think.... I lost my train of thought. So yes, I'm here for the family reunion that I haven't been to since I was a kid and I'm sorta excited to be meeting family that I've never met and to see some family that I haven't seen in years, or at least since April when my Grandpa died. I'm anxious to see what this mini trip brings.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Quiet Summer
Sorry I haven't posted in a while, it's been a quiet summer for me here. I've been working a lot and stopped serving and am just hosting. Hopefully I'll go back to serving once I give my shoulder a break but we'll see. I could really use the money. Classes are still going well and I was up a few weekends this summer to stay with Grandma in Denver for some photography workshops. I would love to move up here and finish that degree. Grandma doesn't understand why I'm doing it and just wants me to teach- when I don't want to do that remotely. I'm looking more into counseling, something like I did with Smart Girl! Woot! Also, I'm going back to Ohio Labor Day weekend. I need a little escape and I'm also just wanting more time to reflect on this year. My Great Aunt died this summer so that brings this number to 3. No one else is sick enough to die in my family so here's to hoping. (that sounds horrible I know, but really... I'm not even done grieving for the previous person and then someone else dies... argh)
Monday, June 9, 2008
Birthdays
So today is my dad's birthday and he's now the big 51! This is an interesting birthday for him since it's the first one since Grandpa died. I am also having an interesting time dealing with it- from more of the reflective state anyway. No travel plans made yet, but looking at going back to Ohio later this year. We'll see!
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Mother's Day
So for Mother's Day this year, we went to The Melting Pot. It's become a favorite for us and celebrating events. Last year, my birthday, this year, Mother's Day, and who knows from there. Anyway, since we hadn't been there since being gluten-free, I was nervous, but while making the reservation, I asked and they said it was possible. I was super excited. We had this great server named Michelle who made sure that everything was perfect for the gluten-free fondue night. Since we had one burner, we all did the oil and did a Big Night out and a half, since it was three of us. We did cheese with corn startch instead of flour. She made sure that instead of ravioli, there was extra meets and that with the batters, mom and dad couldn't use them until I was done cooking. And chocolate, well, we use to Cookies and Cream, Marshmallow Dream, but can't any more, but we did anyway and had the cookies on the side. I had my own platter with regular marshmallows, extra strawberries and loved it! I couldn't believe that such a high end restuarant had gluten-free accomodations and didn't seem bothered. I can only imagine that it's extra work. The night was lovely and wonderful and I grabbed a job application on the way out! We'll see! (x-posted in gluten free)
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